Monday, September 9, 2013

Meat and Poultry

I don't want to write this post. I don't want to do this rule. I don't want to make these recipes.

But I have to.

RULE #5 - MEAT & POULTRY 
Select a maximum of 5 weekly meat meals (luncheon or dinner) from Group A (Chicken, Turkey, Pheasant, Organ Meats, and Rabbit) and/or select a maximum of 3 weekly meat meals from Group B (Beef, Frankfurters, Lamb) 




Portion control is KEY here. For luncheon, 4 ounces of cooked meat may be selected. For dinner, 6 ounces is permitted. It is advised that you weigh your portion. I repeat. WEIGH YOUR PORTION. Do not screw around with this.

Remove all visible fat. Broil, boil, bake or roast ONLY. And for the love of all that is holy --- NO MEAT AT BREAKFAST!

Oh - and lest we forget. Liver is REQUIRED once per week. So figure out when you are gonna fit that into your repertoire.

If I had my druthers, I would completely skip this chapter. I would be perfectly happy without the meat. Without the liver. Without the frankfurters. But - since it is the longest chapter in the book (40 pages), I assume this is an important rule. So onward we go...

As I work up the courage to prepare my next meaty recipe, please enjoy a few Retro WW meat photos.




Why can't we just grill up a nice chicken breast on the Retro WW Program? Why not just a simple frankfurter on a bun? Why must we do horrifying, traumatic things to our meat? I will never understand this.

We may need more than one week to explore this rule. Just sayin'.

Monday, September 2, 2013

Knoxapocalypse II - The Sequel

In a world...(Note: it works best if you say this part in the voice of  legendary movie voiceover guy Don LaFontaine, so go ahead and start over)...IN A WORLD where gel cookery is a competitive bloodsport, six retro food bloggers challenged each other to a full-blown gelatin recipe dare. The stakes were high (not really), and the pressure was almost unbearable (this is a slight exaggeration).

The Bloggers (Erica, Emily, Ruth, Brian, Susie, Jenny and of course - yours truly, Mimi) all submitted a recipe. But not just any recipe. Oh no. It had to be creative, crazy and of course...containing GELATIN. Then they randomly swapped recipes, and got to work. (OK--you can stop with the voice now)

My assignment:   Molded Avocado and Tuna (Courtesy of Brian at Caker Cooking)


Well my friends, it should come as no surprise to you that I am not a stranger to Tuna Molds. As a Retro WW Gal, tuna is my middle name. And FYI - it is also not my first time at the double-decker gelatin mold rodeo. Remember that time I vlogged about it? So yeah. I was feeling pretty confident going into this challenge.


But here's the catch: I have never made a recipe from the Gel Cookery "Bible". ..Or as I like to call it - "The Big Show". That's right. My recipe challenge comes from The SACRED Knox On-Camera Recipes: A completely new guide to Gel-Cookery, 1961. So I knew right away, I better not screw it up, or else the Goddesses of Gelatin would curse my copper molds forever.

Since I was already familiar with the process of making a double decker gelatin mold, I knew I would need to set aside a nice long chunk of time to complete my challenge. Like 8-10 hours. No shit. By the way, it amazes me to think about the women who actually prepared this type of food on the reg. How did they have so much time on their hands? How did they do anything else?

I digress.

So--long story short. The top layer goes in first. So it looks like the bottom layer now. But, you know. You're going to flip it over later. So this will all make sense at the end.


Mayo, Sour Cream and Avocado. Hail to FAT!

The tricky part of this whole project is TIMING. The consistency of the gelatin must be JUST RIGHT or else it all falls apart. So when you add the bottom layer (It will look like the top layer now. But you get it), the top layer can't be completely firm, but it also can't be too soft either. So you find yourself checking the mold 20 or so times to make sure it is exactly the right moment before you pour in the next layer.

You are like some crazy OCD mental patient in a fancy apron, jumping up every five minutes, running to the fridge and sticking your finger in the gelatin to test the firmness. It really is bizarre.


Tuna and Veggies - Suspended in Gel

So now you have both layers chilling until completely firm. My advice? Go out for cocktails. Go shopping. Go to bed. Otherwise you will just obsess over the damn thing.

Now comes my favorite part. No seriously. It is one of my favorite things on Earth to do. After hours and hours of waiting. And then a few more hours after that...You get to UNMOLD.

Like a BOSS

I soak mine in a little lukewarm water, run a knife around the edges and then flip it over onto a plate. The moment of release when it makes that sound -- THWAPPPHH --- is quite possibly the greatest triumph any human being can experience.

Look at it.

NAILED IT!

No really look at it.

Really get in there

I hate the thought of even slicing it up and eating it. To me, a gelatin mold is more a work of art than an edible meal. But a major part of this challenge is actually taking a taste, and reporting our results.

So I gingerly took a small bite. And it wasn't too bad. So I ate some more. Maybe 3 or 4 big bites. It was cool and refreshing. It was creamy and crunchy. A perfect balance. I took two more bites. And then I instantly got heartburn. Like full-on GERD. Oh boy, my body did not like this combo one little bit. Ooof.

Anyone have a Prilosec handy?

When my husband snapped this picture, his exact words were, "Congratulations on another disgusting, inedible slab of crap, honey!"

So there it is. Another masterpiece. Or slab of crap. Whatever you want to call it. Either way, I am glad it is over. Until next time....I ask myself will there be a Knoxapocalypse III - The Trilogy??? Only time will tell.

If you have a hankering for some more gelatin, and you want to keep this party going, please visit the other bloggers posts to see what they came up with. But I warn you. Tread lightly...You are dealing with the Jello Mafia. It could get ugly.

Emily at Dinner is Served 1972Olive Wreath Mold
Erica at Retro Recipe AttemptsBetty Davis’s Mustard Ring
Brian at Caker CookingMaple Fluff
Susie at Bittersweet Susie Melon Mousse - A Retro WW Recipe submitted by ME!!!
Jenny at Silver Screen Suppers  – Turkey In Aspic
Ruth at Mid-Century Menu Pickle and Pineapple Salad